Thread:Dantman/@comment-32617252-20180527205158/@comment-34115-20180528005115

Sorry, I get notifications quickly but I am slow at writing. I started writing my message before you edited your message and I didn't get notified of your edit. This is actually why I often end up ignoring talkpage requests for programming/template/infobox assistance and questions that others can answer. It would take me a significant amount of time just to write a message turning them down.

The first two examples of behaviour I gave were the reasons for the block. The following two requests were for behaviour I wanted you to be aware of and curb in the future.

We actually have a requests page which appears to be linked in a message at the top of topics. I'm not sure how well a forum version of that will work, given that the forums are not designed to handle long topics like this one would become.

And sorry for not explaining. The sexist phrasing is not phrasing where you identify yourself as a man or male, but is in response to your " if i wanna discuss and talk shit, i do it like a man" comment.

I was hoping that while you reflect on the reasons you were blocked, you might consider the implications of other things you say. The commonly used "like a man" phrase ending is one that comes from a history of toxic masculinity. It's culturally normal to use because it was once culturally acceptable to shame men for not behaving in ways culturally deemed as masculine and shame women for behaving in ways deemed masculine. The phrase end doubly implies that it's wrong for a man to not behave in the way described in the phrase and wrong for a women to behave in the way described. I want you to understand that when phrases like these are used they reinforce negative cultural norms about gender, norms related to things that have historically caused people psychological harm.

Ideally the most civil way to write messages is to avoid writing an extra sentence when the sentence before already conveyed your point and the following sentence doesn't add anything and may simply aggravate the other party and turn a civil discussion into an argument. In this context your first sentence "sorry, not me." already conveyed your point. Personally even I find myself writing extra to try and enforce or explain a point I am making and end up deleting what I've written while writing it after realizing that it doesn't improve my point and instead may just turn the discussion into a pointless argument.

That said, that's pretty difficult to do sometimes so here's an alternate thought. Most of the time when you'd end a sentence with "like a man" the phrase end "like an adult" actually conveys the same intent, but is linked to the maturity of having grown up and learned life lessons instead of being linked to gender norms.